More and more, I am coming to understand stories through the lens of power. We use to teach at storywise.com that “the power of stories is the story of power.” But recent studies in how memory works show that this isn’t even the half of it.
It seems to work this way:
We live life and 99.9% gets forgotten-but some experiences get told as stories and these stories stock up our memories such that with every retelling, we create an experience that purports to be a re-experience of the first experience-Sure!!!! I was there, I saw it happen, its not a story, its real, we say. In law courts, in relationships, at family reunions.
But our brain tricks us, because it knows- its an experience of the story- (think about it -past reality is lost to us in irretrievable time. The souvenir of Big Ben is not Big Ben.) Yet the more we retell, we more we feel we have somehow redeemed lost time and lost realities. (as Proust would say.) Stories are both resurrection and redemption.
The deeper the memory becomes, the more real it feels because every telling adds a new layer of experiencing, one that adds the attention energy every new audience offers. We tell a story about what happened back when, but what we are after is what will happen right now-from our listeners- laughter, joy, congratulations, pity, outrage, admiration, an offer of marriage, a book contract even. The more we get the response we want, the truer the story becomes. If my audience are crying for what I had to endure, I must have had to endure it. Right? Makes sense.
Over time, the way the brain is rewired, we cannot tell the difference between the original experience and the experience we created through the story of “I remember when…” Think of the childhood memories you tell so well that later on, you realize you could not possibly have been there to witness. “I remember well the devastating floods of 1947…. even though I was born in 1955.”
If experience gets translated into stories that create memories that work to present “recalled” experience as real and true, it can also work the other way.
Memories, even false memories can be translated into stories that go on to create experiences that feel so vivid to be real and true, and trustworthy enough to act on. That can be as simple as telling our kids about the boogey man to inoculate them against going out in the dark alone. Or more dangerous stories about a kid “seducing” a white girl to incite a lynch mob, or about heroic Pat Tillman who wins a medal for valor against the enemy that killed him, when all along, the army knew it was friendly fire. It had to be true, they said, even when it wasn’t. We don’t kill our heroes.
Power becomes the art of telling the story so well that it feels real enough for people to believe, and trustworthy enough to act on, kill for, or go buy. The brain does not have enough discriminatory juices to determine a true story from one that feels to us like it has to be true. What we once believed about WMDs, Columbine, Mathew Sheppard’s murder, Jessica Lynch, Balloon boy, all proved to be largely fictions, and all prove that some stories can make truth irrelevant. (Yes-Read that sentence again) How scarey is that? And what a recipe for a power grab!
Someone once said, stories are the lies we tell ourselves to make us feel the truth, but we have to face it, “true stories” is a contradiction. There is no “real story.” Its the irony of the label non-fiction, which is an impossible claim, yet one we buy all the time.
Conclusion? Power is based on selective lying. The most believable/ feelable story is the one that makes the most triumphant truth claims, If we can tell ourselves a good enough story, we can basically reinvent reality.
Ooops. Have to go, the purple pigs flying outside my window are making a racket because they are being chased by my blue dinosaur. Did I forgot to feed Rex again?