The Nevada Shriners were having a conference on “The power of timely postponements” and sadly, they have had to postpone it in a rather untimely way,
The Irish health committee’s conference on “How epidemics become pandemics” has been cancelled because we already know.
“How the USA Government deals with infection outbreaks from the Spanish flu to Ebola” has been transferred to the E&R ward of John Hopkins Hospital-bring your paper but wear a mask please
-“The Mass on Sundays obligation” Blessed Virgin Mary Club conference sponsored by the Pope Paul VI federation in Pittsburgh has been defined as a mass gathering that contradicts ICU guidelines on Corona Virus so the Obligation has been reduced to a devotion. If you can’t go to mass, light a candle, say a rosary, but disinfect the beads first and twist in three cirlces for the persons of the Trinity.
“Innovation in Sanitary Care” co-sponsored by Dove and DeLoittes to reinvent the toliet roll has been remamed “The future of Futures- How toliet rolls can save Wall Street.-Old technology is new-Lets invest in Steam trains.”
– “Trust in National Leadership in moments of crisis” conference hosted by Jesus Liberty University is going to proceed as planned, and the holy water is being infused with hand sanitizer. Jesus healed the sick and he had no CDC or Doctor Fauci.